Someone You Loved (Closed)

[Abraham Bishop]

There was so much that needed to be done. He needed to go over options for a new security system - To say he distrusted Tim would have been an understatement. He wanted Alice to have nothing to do with the new system and thus didn't want Tim either. The old system was flawed, in his opinion, because Alice was so ingrained in it that her emotions affected it. If she had any involvement in the new one, it risked the same flaws, even if she and Tim refused to believe that. Then there was possible missions to send his covert unit on. He needed to go over the options and assign a level of urgency to each one before he could start coming up with rough drafts of mission plans. There was a lot that went into running the covert infiltration unit as well as being a Pillar. Liling had mentioned she'd been considering getting an outside opinion for more than just the security. She hadn't told him any details so he'd simply assumed she wasn't entirely set on the idea yet. She was his best friend, after all, and the two of them were extremely close among the five Pillars so he assumed she would tell him more once she knew all she planned to do. Apparently he was wrong. He noticed the door leading to the Pillars' meeting room was unlocked. That meant one of his fellow Pillars must have been inside. He didn't think he was the most popular with some of his fellow Pillars right now but he honestly couldn't have cared less. He wasn't trying to win a popularity contest. He was trying to lead Aegis, to keep the team respectable, trustworthy, and worthy of the reputation the founders had fought to earn. He would have thought John and Bradley would have understood. But it wasn't a fellow Pillar he found as the door slid open and he stepped inside the room. He saw the back of the head first. It was just the back of the head but there was something familiar already in that and the build, the rest of the body. But then the other man turned. Abraham's heart felt like it was being constricted. His eyes stared widely, his face blanking. How long had it been since they'd last stood in the same room? It had been before he'd been a Pillar. It felt like another lifetime, if not an entirely different life. Instantly the memories came flooding back, though. Memories of a happier time, of skin against his, of love. Memories of abandonment, of anger. All they brought was pain now as he regarded Dimitri, his gaze becoming cold. "What are you doing here?" he asked, trying hard to keep his voice even. "How the hell did you even get in here?" He strode farther into the room, taking a seat in the Pillar seat that belonged to him. He thought of attacks that had made the news. The explosions that had rocked the city and then the attack that had wounded Icarus. They'd been able to keep most of what had gone on inside the headquarters away from the press, but those journalists weren't stupid. "Come to gloat?" he couldn't help adding, his tone bitter. "Rub it in?" He leaned forward in his chair, resting his arms down against his knees, clasping his hands together. "Last time I checked, you didn't trust us-" He made sure to make it clear that included himself. Dimitri hadn't trusted Aegis and he'd taken that personally. Abraham was part of Aegis, after all. "So why else would you be here?"

... the joy and the chaos, the demons we're made of. i'd be so lost if you left me alone ... the phantom @dimitri outfit 607 words Takes place after Regrouping.

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[Deleted]

He found, interestingly enough, that he was completely unsurprised to be walking those halls again. Standing in that room again. And, when Dimitri Castle turned the observation over like a jeweler would a gem, he couldn't decide if he'd genuinely thought he'd never be at Aegis HQ, or if he'd just dearly hoped. Memories, emotions, flashbacks rose like the tide each turn he took. Dimitri had expected those, though, and was prepared. He sifted through them with bittersweet distance, keeping them at arm's length and not letting them crowd into his mind or chest. He had a job to do, and had always been one to put that first... Other than a few, pivotal instances. Standing in the beating heart of Aegis, Dimitri's eyes scanned the commanding table with its special seats; names or symbols etched on them to detail whose they were - like the Pillars couldn't be bothered to remember the seating chart. The floor was polished to such a sheen that a watery mirror image of the room looked up there: the monitors, the table, the seats, and Dimitri in his form-fitting black leather jacket, pants and boots. When you'd trained your whole life to go unnoticed, the feeling of eyes on you was unmistakable. But Dimitri knew that particular gaze that he could feel boring into his back, and as prepared as he thought he was for it, the spy had to fall back on training etched on his bones to behave impartially. Footsteps bounced along the floor, and Foxglove turned to look over his shoulder at the man who had once held his heart. The look of shock, then pain that scattered like broken glass through Abraham's face was not something Dimitri relished in the least bit. He followed the other man's progress toward his seat, not moving, not butting in, letting him sling his bitter comments out and waiting for him to calm. Dimitri had had a feeling Liling had kept his coming under wraps. He wished she hadn't. Abraham had deserved to know; surely didn't deserve to have Dimitri sprung on him, like had just happened. The Phantom finished his lined of questions, leaning forward on his knees, glaring raw and fierce. "I don't trust anyone," Dimitri reminded with the faintest upward pluck to one side of his mouth and an artful shrug of one shoulder, "remember?" Dimitri could only imagine what Abraham must've been feeling in the wake of the attack on Aegis - how vulnerable and disoriented; all things he was unused to feeling, and didn't know how to cope with. Then, on top of it all, to have Dimitri there. If roles had been reversed... Well, for how well Foxglove knew himself, he still wasn't totally sure how he'd have reacted. "As for why I'm here, why not check your inbox?" Foxglove doubted protocol in this particular way had changed since he'd left Aegis: even if Liling had kept his contracted help under wraps until now, with his feet in the HQ the Pillars would've all been given a briefing about his presence, purpose and clearance levels. Dimitri stood there hands folded in front of him, waiting patiently, either unable or unwilling to help the distinctly clever and all-knowing air he tended to put off. His eyes rested on Abraham's barbed stare, and for all the cool, collected image he put on, his chest simmered and bubbled with a tumble of emotions he'd not expected to bite so deeply.

... And now your song is on repeat and I'm dancin' on to your heartbeat. and when you're gone, I feel incomplete ... foxglove Abraham Bishop

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[Abraham Bishop]

He frowned at Dimitri's reminder, feeling the words like the blade of a knife. He thought there was a time when there would have been an exception to the other man's distrust - when he would have been an exception. He still wasn't sure what he'd done to lose that trust. He wasn't sure why he hadn't been enough - enough for Dimitri to trust Aegis, enough for him to stay. "I learned that lesson well," he replied coldly, unable to keep a touch of genuine pain from his voice. He hadn't ever really moved on or tried to. He'd simply focused more and more on his work with Aegis. Work had been easier, a welcomed distraction. His promotion to a Pillar seat had only increased that distraction. The pain had been buried, numbed, but now the wound felt as if it was being torn open. Abraham paused, brows furrowing with confusion. Then it dawned on him. Liling. He closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, letting out a sigh much more tired than it should have been. He vaguely recalled all those years ago, telling her he didn't want to hear a damn thing about Dimitri. She'd seen how much the breakup, how much him leaving, had devastated him. She'd known what he'd been planning right before that happened. He didn't care that she'd clearly kept in touch with the man who had broken his heart. She was a grown woman and allowed to have whatever friends she wanted. He just wished she'd told him that this was the outside opinion she was asking for. He had no doubt she'd told the other Pillars. He'd been specifically left out. Though he also understood why she'd done it - or at least what was most likely her reasoning. He would have argued against it, done all in his power to prevent her from asking Dimitri for help. But Dimitri was one of the best, if not the best. His opinion, his help was invaluable. If he removed his own emotions, his own personal feelings regarding this, he knew it was a wise decision. But his feelings were so hard to ignore, if not impossible. His eyes opened and he let out another sigh, some of that pride he always wore gone. "Well you may not trust anyone," he said as he stood up, running a hand through his hair. "But clearly Liling trusts you." He paused, having to mentally remind himself that Liling's trust was good enough - It had to be. He stepped over to Dimitri, trying hard to push down the feelings that made bubble up. He extended a hand, awkward and a bit uncomfortable but knowing he was on the clock, he was representing Aegis. He had to be professional. "Thank you. I-- Aegis appreciates your help."

... the joy and the chaos, the demons we're made of. i'd be so lost if you left me alone ... the phantom @dimitri outfit 469 words n/a

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[Deleted]

Dimitri stood, watching Abraham with perfected neutrality. It was surreal. The man sitting in front of him was so different than the Abraham that had been his - time had sobered and jaded him, Liling had hinted as much over the years, but now he saw that was true. And yet... Dimitri could still read him better than he could almost anyone. He wondered if Abraham saw a stranger, looking at him. If time had altered Dimitri as much, too, and he'd not noticed. Above all, if Abraham was able to read him - something that no one else had been able to do, historically. The Phantom had learned to see the truth behind Foxglove's acting and espionage, even when Dimitri tried to hide it, once upon a time. Dimitri saw the emotions shift and change in Abraham as he put the pieces of this puzzle together and coped. The spy felt a sorrow bubble up, dull and deadening, at how bowed down by the weight of his position Abraham was. Dimitri thought, for a split-second, of how different things would have been if Abraham just followed him, when he chose to cut ties with Aegis. Foxglove snatched that line of thinking up, though, folded it neatly and tucked it deep, deep inside. There was no use in it. These were the cards they'd played and the hands they'd been dealt. Abraham seemed to have made up his mind on what to think about Dimitri's return. He stood, speaking, and Foxglove watched passively as the Phantom closed the distance between them. "Thank you. I-- Aegis appreciates your help." Dimitri looked at the hand being offered him. There was no avoiding taking it. There was no reason to. He'd decided when Liling contracted his help he wasn't going to make a secret of it. Why should he? If anything hiding the truth was just disrespectful to Abraham and the current man in Dimitri's life. So, with that same, vague, crooked smile that didn't change the analytic light in his eyes, Dimitri took the offered hand and shook it. The band on his left-hand ring finger, no longer concealed by his other palm laying overtop of it, glimmered in the fluorescent lights. Dimitri paid it no mind. He pretended it wasn't there. Instead, he said, "It's my pleasure." Dimitri held onto Abraham's hand a little longer than necessary, studying his face up close - the subtle ways their time apart had changed it. But the shock and pain that Dimitri found lurking in Abraham's eyes hit him beneath the ribs with more force than even someone as used to acting and subterfuge as Foxglove could counter. He retrieved his hand, swallowed and spoke in a small, quiet voice very unlike him. "Liling is expecting me." Dimitri turned to leave and stopped at the door. He waited a beat, going back and forth, then looked over his shoulder. "And, Abraham? It's good to see you." Then Foxglove left the Pillars's council room. [Exit: Dimitri]

... And now your song is on repeat and I'm dancin' on to your heartbeat. and when you're gone, I feel incomplete ... foxglove Abraham Bishop

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[Abraham Bishop]

He wanted to watch Dimitri, to look for any signs that the pain he felt was mutual, that maybe Dimitri regretted leaving. But watching him, looking at him, it made it more easier to remember all the moments they'd shared together. It made the pain worse. His heart leapt at the feeling of Dimitri's hand in his. It felt as right as he remembered it. It brought with it the urge to pull the other man closer, to press their lips together. He hadn't thought the urge would return so strong - or rather he'd hoped it wouldn't. But then his eyes glanced down at Dimitri's hand. It was such a surprise, he couldn't even consider trying to mask or hide the shock it brought and the pain it increased. He remembered plotting with Liling, showing her a ring with a lovely purple gem engraved in it. The two of them had spent hours comparing gem colors to foxglove flowers. He'd asked her to help him plan the whole day, plan the whole setup and even hide in bushes if need be to sneak photos of it. He remembered the fight that had happened before they could ever go, before he could ever ask that question. The ring now sat in his dresser - He should have sold it but he'd never wanted to. Now it seemed someone had beat him to it. In the back of his mind, he'd always been aware of some hope that Dimitri would return, that he'd apologize and come back, that'd he'd be enough for Dimitri to stay. He had never tried to move on, he was aware of that. A part of him had just hoped the same could be said about Dimitri, but he'd been foolish to hope. There was a lump in his throat, he felt like he was trying to swallow glass. His hand felt cold the second Dimitri's pulled away. He wondered if he looked as pale as he felt. He noted the change in tone, how unlike him it was. He wanted to reach for him and tell him everything was okay, but it wasn't and he clearly had someone else to comfort him when he needed. Holding Dimitri wasn't his place anymore - It hadn't been for a long time. Abraham was quiet, eyes on the ground as Dimitri turned to leave. He took a moment to register his words but by the time he did, Dimitri was gone. He slumped into the nearest chair - he was fairly certain it was Bradley's. He should have insisted Dimitri stay more. He should have gotten the ring out and asked him there, reassuring him that he was loved and wanted in Astaria, in his life. It'd been so long since he'd ever cried. He'd tried so hard to harden himself, to avoid being hurt like he'd been in the past. But none of that felt like it mattered right now. He barely made a sound as his shoulders shook, a hand over his mouth, eyes shut tightly as he tried to keep the tears from falling but they refused to listen.

... the joy and the chaos, the demons we're made of. i'd be so lost if you left me alone ... the phantom @dimitri outfit 519 words n/a

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