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last online Feb 3, 2022 1:17:46 GMT
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Post by Hades Black on Nov 9, 2021 6:14:31 GMT
Hades heard the struggling but didn't step in and offer the shark ones, knowing that she has to ask for them. As is, he felt that she was slowly picking it up again. He felt proud of her. He did frown when he noticed that her voice lost some of that confident cheer she had when talking about her world and knew it was for a reason.
"Well...there's nothing wrong with missing your world and talking about it. This may be your world, but you're allowed to mourn over the loss of your old world, much like one would when moving from one house to another. Granted, it's a lot bigger and with a lot of difference, but it still holds the same principle. Just like moving from houses, you'll find that you miss that one spot that you always went to, but learn of a new spot that's just as good or better than the original."
Hades sat up and set his chopsticks on the empty bowl and laced his fingers together. "But you need to remember that it can hurt, hearing these differences. If it's hurting you more than normal, you need to take a step back and let it go. Let yourself focus on something simple and let those thoughts wander away. Try not to focus on them if you can. It's okay to compare and it's okay to remember you home. But it's also okay if you find yourself forgetting your world too. Just...don't push yourself when you find yourself at an edge. Mourn, but don't harm yourself too."
He chewed on his lip in thought and gave a small smile. "Treat your world like you would when you lost someone close to you. Because your world was a big part of you and your memories. Mourn for your loss and take one step at a time. If you need a break, take one. If you need to cry, cry. Remember the important memories you held with that world and try to create new ones here in this world."
He reached out and tapped near her hand. "It's gonna be rough and long. You're gonna feel homesick and get angry at the world. You're gonna break down and cry, get into fights with people you don't want to get into fights with. Break things you wish you didn't break, all of that. That's part of the healing process. But remember that you're not alone. Lean on those you trust and they will support you when you're not strong enough to support yourself. Okay?"
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played by AJ
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last online Apr 3, 2024 3:20:50 GMT
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Post by Tayla Smith on Nov 9, 2021 19:21:27 GMT
He was making some sense, talking about treating this world like moving to a new home. It’s what she did, quite literally in fact. Still, even though she knew he couldn’t see it, she averted her eyes and avoided meeting his. But then he mentioned losing a loved one, and all the walls slammed back up. She stiffened, straightening in her seat. When he tapped near her hand, she pulled away. “No. No if I treat my world like losing a loved one, bad things will happen. I’m fine. I’ll be fine. I’m doing great. And you know what? I’m fine on my own. There is a grand total of two people in this world I have even a modicum of trust in, and even then it’s not that much. So what is it you’re really after? Get me to say something incriminating? Just psychological torment because it gets your rocks off? What’s your angle?” She humphed and turned away. “This “Oh-noes” person probably couldn’t do anything with this suit anyway, it’s so advanced I can barely figure it out myself.” Hades Black
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played by KingJ
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last online Feb 3, 2022 1:17:46 GMT
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Post by Hades Black on Nov 9, 2021 21:00:39 GMT
"His name is Honos, like after the Roman deity for morality and honor. Specifically military honor but honor regardless." He corrected. "On-nos. Close on the pronunciation though. And I thought you'd like to talk to the kid who made this" He pulled out his older brother's leg, mentally apologizing for taking the backup when Erebus was still testing out the new one. "when he was 10 years old. He recently made a new one for my older brother. It's kinda like your suit, but in a prosthetic. I'm pretty sure he could make something like your suit, given enough time. Say...about a week. Give or take a few days. Also, please don't break it, Erebus is still trying out the new one and we need this one in case that one is a bust."
"As your comment on being fine on your own, you do know that's opening yourself to being killed a lot fast and easier right? Lone beings don't live as long as those in a communal group. We're human. We need to have the constant contact with people we trust or just people we enjoy being around with. Babies have died when not given the constant touch and attention that they need. Children's growth get stunted when isolated. Adults get suicidal and find themselves in an early grave when constantly left alone with no meaningful social interactions. You'll put yourself in that early grave before helping this world if you keep that mentality." He pointed out.
"As for your comment on me doing psychological torment because it gets me off, I'd like to point out that it's not the case. Me trying to incriminate you is hypocritical of me when I've killed and broke laws since I was 10 years old and on the streets. What I'm after is to be your support person. That's it. Be someone you feel comfortable with going to when you need to talk. When you're in a tight spot and need help. To vent to. To have someone in your corner. I've done a lot of horrible things in my life but I do not turn my back on those who need me the most." He frowned and waved his dirty dishes into his sink. "My angle is to just be there for you like I was at the pier. To be a possible friend you want that. But mostly to just remind you and make sure that you know you're not alone anymore. Okay? I don't think you'll be put in a situation where you're forced to eat human to just survive, but goodness if you need to be bailed out, I will bail you out in a heartbeat. No questions asked."
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played by AJ
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last online Apr 3, 2024 3:20:50 GMT
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Post by Tayla Smith on Nov 9, 2021 21:44:40 GMT
A million retorts were rolling through Tayla’s head, and she was upset enough to not have enough of a filter to keep them all out. “WHY? Why give a shit about me when there’s nothing in it for you? I’m a fuck up! A cautionary tale! “Be grateful for good guardians, kids, or else you’ll end up like Tayla Smith!” Maybe I’m meant to be alone! Maybe that’s my grand purpose whatever deranged being, if any, that adjudicates the multiverse has for me! To fuck up and die alone.” Tayla pulled her knees up to her chest, not even acknowledging the prosthetic leg. “Maybe it would be better for everyone if I was gone. Like gone gone, not like how I left the Resistance. I’m a fuck up, a failure, and everyone that gets close to me gets hurt because of me. Nobody would get close to me on purpose if they knew better. And I don’t deserve them to.” Hades Black
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played by KingJ
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last online Feb 3, 2022 1:17:46 GMT
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Post by Hades Black on Nov 9, 2021 21:57:51 GMT
Hades expected the yelling, but not the words. He tapped twice on his chair, getting the attention of Cerberus, and pointed towards Tayla. Cerberus walked over and pushed his head between her legs and gave her face a very wet kiss. He 'talked' to her to get her attention and huffed with his face against her belly.
"Why give a shit about anyone when you expect something out of it? That's not how friendship works with me. You are not a cautionary tale, Tayla. You are a victim of a shit life and shit experiences. And I promise you that there's someone in your life that would be devastated if you just up and left the world of the living to meet the world of the dead. Or just leave and be gone in general." Hades spoke gently.
"You're not a fuck up or a failure. Shit happens, hun. The world sucks and hurts the good people and praises the bad. Don't push people away because shit happened then. You deserve to have people in your life. You deserve to let them be close to you. To love you and cherish you like friends do. Like family do. Like lovers do. Tell me. Did you raise a hand to someone you cared about? Hit them because you wanted to hit them? Hurt them because you wanted them to hurt? Did you kill them because you wanted to and knew you could?"
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played by AJ
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last online Apr 3, 2024 3:20:50 GMT
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Post by Tayla Smith on Nov 9, 2021 22:38:00 GMT
Tayla couldn't help but embrace the dog as he put his face up near hers. She couldn't feel him lick her face, but she didn't care. There was just too much going on, Cerberus was just too sweet and wholesome to not embrace, and she really really wanted that comfort, even if she didn't think she deserved it. After a moment, she took a shaky breath and began to respond to Hades' questioning. "My parents are dead because I intentionally made the conditions for an easily preventable accident. They died by my hand. I pushed the button. I knew what could--what would happen. That accident split me into two beings. Two aspects of myself." She looked up and stared into Hades' milky white eyes. "That other part of me did horrible things. Just for kicks. Because she got off on the pain and suffering of others. I killed her. I stared into her eyes, my eyes, while I choked the life out of her. There was no remorse. No guilt. She laughed. She laughed because we both knew she would never really be dead. She's always a part of me. I'm responsible for all of that. Everything." Her voice quivered on the edge of tears. Something about Hades took a cat-o-nine-tails to her emotions, tearing them raw. "I went and tried to fix things by finding a universe where the accident didn't happen at all. Where everyone was still alive. Where I wasn't a murderer that would never be brought to justice because "it was an accident." And all I succeeded in doing was fucking up another universe. What I deserve is to be buried in a deep pit or thrown into a singularity." She still didn't let go of Cerberus during all of this. Hades Black
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played by KingJ
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last online Feb 3, 2022 1:17:46 GMT
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Post by Hades Black on Nov 9, 2021 23:26:49 GMT
Hades takes a drink of his tea as he listened to Tayla. He listened to her speak and listened to her body language. He heard Cerberus comfort her physically and knew that this woman really needed a hug. "You, Tayla Smith, are very much like the Timothy Smith in this universe." He spoke, voice calm.
"Much like you, he fucked around and created the anti version of him. Much like you, he believes that the anti person is the personification of every bad thought he ever had and did a shit ton of bad just for shits and giggles. But I'll tell you what I want to tell him. She is her own person. She was created from you, yes. But she's her own person, just like how you're your own person. She was basically the mitosis creation from you. She's basically a twin created outside of the womb. But that doesn't mean that everything she did is your responsibility. Otherwise, I'd be responsible for Apollyon's and Erebus' shit. She was her own person just like my brothers are their own person. You're not at fault for the shit she did, Tayla Smith."
"You had to kill her, I assume, to protect someone. Yourself, the world, a friend... regardless, you don't deserve to be thrown away and locked up. It may be an accident. It may not be an accident. But that doesn't justify you being locked away from the people you care about. You still have a chance to help this universe, you still have a chance to heal and to grow. You're fixing what you've done in the only way you can and I respect that."
"You may have fucked up by doing the 'fuck around and find out' method, taking the life of your parents, and creating someone that's basically the anti you, but I think that moment is one of those moments that has to happen. The universe you tried to help is proof of that. That accident will always happen. Anti-you will always happen. The outcome of it? How you react to that person? That can change. It's how you react to the situation. Maybe this time, you can help the you here help anti them to not become what anti you became. From what I understand, it's only been a few years or so since the accident. You have time if you want to help him. It might help you too. But regardless, what matters right now is you. What you deserve, Tayla is to be helped and supported. What you deserve is to have people in your life. To not be alone. Tayla, you matter and those who care for you won't throw you away for the things you've done."
"You've already been punished enough for it. It's time to work on moving past it and to prove to yourself that you're not the same person as you were back then, okay?"
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played by AJ
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last online Apr 3, 2024 3:20:50 GMT
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Post by Tayla Smith on Nov 10, 2021 4:01:27 GMT
Tayla grumbled into Cerberus' fur, annoyed that she couldn't feel it on her face. "Fuck the me in this universe." She looked up at him, tears on the verge of spilling out from her eyes, but held back by sheer frustration and determination. "You don't understand. She wasn't the anti-me. My evil twin. No she was me. She was me if I got pushed just right. She is me. It's all still there. I can hear her laugh in my head when I sleep. It's not like the twin thing. You weren't conscious when you were one organism. We had the same experiences and thoughts and memories up until the accident. She was and is me." She shifted off of the seat to sit on the ground, closer to the big dog. He was soothing. He made her feel safe, even if talking with Hades was dredging up bad feelings. He was a good boy. "I don't want anything to do with the me in this universe. Famous prick with comic books and trading cards and lunchboxes and what not with his face on them. I don't need him, he definitely doesn't need me. Besides, it's less confusing for people if we stay away from each other." Hades Black
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played by KingJ
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last online Feb 3, 2022 1:17:46 GMT
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Post by Hades Black on Nov 10, 2021 4:16:20 GMT
Cerberus grumbled and huffed before placing his head on top of hers. He was helping and he was proud that he was being such a good boy on helping.
Hades hummed and nodded. "I didn't know that. I just know that much because Orion wants feedback on Tim. I'm sorry about misunderstanding the situation, but I still stand by what she did after the split not applying to you point. She was her own person after the split. Anyways, would you like to talk about something else for a bit? Ask me any questions? Or do you want to just relax and talk to Cerberus for a bit? I don't mind regardless." He offered, feeling that he pushed too hard and need to pull back with her so that he doesn't hurt her. She needed a break from the heavy and he wanted to give her that out.
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played by AJ
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last online Apr 3, 2024 3:20:50 GMT
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Post by Tayla Smith on Nov 10, 2021 5:41:52 GMT
Tayla just breathed shakily for a good few minutes. Then, there was a sound almost like ruffling cards met some kind of metallic clicking, with just a hint of a zipper sound as her nanofiber mask came up in response to her thoughts. She buried her masked, now feeling face in the dog. She was glad her suit simulated how it felt. She was mad it didn't feel quite right. She was also mad that she was crying and couldn't get a handle on her emotions right now. After a few minutes, she spoke again. She desperately wanted to change the topic to something light, ask about the food or something. But she really couldn't help what came out of her mouth next. "Why. I don't... I don't understand. Why do you want to help me. Why does anyone want to help me. I can't for the life of me figure out what you'll get out of it. What any of you will get out of it. I don't understand." She snuggled her face into Cerberus' fur and continued. "I punched the first guy I met when I came here. He was with Aegis. Arrested me, for good reason. But he died. And he left me a little medical drone. Fucking thought of the crazy woman that didn't feel pain and punched him in the face and left her a drone that could do stitches. I lived in an abandoned warehouse for a while. Robbed a store and held up a moving van driver with a nerf gun for a getaway vehicle. She not only got me out of getting arrested again but got me a job and fucking shares an apartment with me. Guy from Aegis comes to check on me. Saves me from an overzealous neighbor that thought I was some inept burglar. Makes me dinner. Fucking asks me on a date. I have a date with this guy. Why. Why do any of you all do it? You get nothing out of this exchange. Nothing from interacting with me." Hades Black
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played by KingJ
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